Reason 12 – sometimes they just don’t get it
Posted by Beentheredonethat on December 1, 2008
So I was dating a boy. A lovely, lovely boy. Who was witty, funny, charming, rich, yadda, yadda, yadda. We went out for a good few months and I did really like him. But there was something missing. Something wasn’t there. And, I think it was the extra eight cenitmetres he could have had at the end of his penis. Now, I know size doesn’t matter, and it’s not the size of the tide, it’s the motion of the ocean, and all of that crap that men with small penises and the women who date them sprout often to people who really, really don’t want to know. But for me, a bit of size is good. As is a bit of longevity in the bedroom. Like longer than a few minutes please. Please!!
For a few months, I enjoyed his company and put up with the disaster in the bedroom. It was after talking to a friend who told me that she was surprised I would stay with someone that I wasn’t “totally into”, and she was right, it’s not normally my style. I am normally of the mindset of “why waste time with someone when “the one” could be waiting around the corner”. It had gotten to the point where I almost dreaded the physical intimacy with Reason 12 – because it was just that bad.
So, I had “the chat” and explained that I really, really liked Reason 12 and thought he was a great guy but that I really wasn’t after a relationship. It was my own unique, polite way of saying “it’s not happening for me in the bedroom (like ever!) and your personality isn’t enough to carry this relationship past that.”
Reason 12, being the gentleman that he was, told me he knew I wasn’t after a relationship and thought I might need to get some counselling/therapy or something for my “issues in the bedroom”. He advised me that ”when we started going out, you were fine, but after a while, you just became so frigid. You should really get some help with that.”
Right.. Thanks Reason 12. I took it on the chin and didn’t have the heart to tell him that his problems were probably beyond help, unless he wanted a penis extension and some Viagra.
